My sisters email to me

This is the reply I got from the email I wrote her. It make me cry, and I am truely grateful I have her for a sister.
These past few days have me thinking back too. I don't remember much. I think my mind does not want me too. It is a shame that most of the things I remember are bad. As a kid I really didn't like you very much. You were mean. I didn't think you liked me very much. The fact that you had feelings never dawned on me. The fact that you were hurting never dawned on me either. I guess I was too wrapped up in my own terror to notice. Maybe if I had things would have been easier for you. We could have fought the demon together. I will never forget the day you left. When you left I didn't realize you meant for good. When I was old enough to learn what you had done with your life I was angry thinking you were stupid and selfish to choose that. When I finally matured I realized how bad it must have been for you to leave and turn to that kind of life. I felt sorry for you. I think you were right when you said it might have been harder for you because you were so much older. To have your mother walk out being old enough to know she is gone but not know why is tough. I am sorry that all that happened to you. I have gotten so much out of the life that I had even though it sucked. It made me what I am today. Not the way I wanted to get here but...Ya know. I assume it is the same for you too. I hope that next time you feel the need to work things out you include me too so we can fight the demon together like we should have before. I think the one thing that dad always hurt over was losing you. Mostly because he blamed himself. And there should be lot of blame in there for him. I hope that it helps him get some peace. Maybe he wont feel the need to drink so much. I truly believe that at some point in your life you have to take responsibility for you actions. And I suppose at 14 you should have had to take responsibility then for some. But you were a kid who come from a really really disfunctional family. I don't know any kid who when asked would choose a life on the streets over a loving family. I am really proud that you have taken responsibility now. You can't change the past and that is why I decided to talk to you again.Now we work on the future. You loving sister...